Jane Austen, Asperger's Syndrome and other Nonsense

I continue to be fascinated by her and I love her books. I love that she was so great at writing about love, yet never married. She was known to be an "observer". She was thought to be most like Mr. Bennet than any of the other characters she wrote. She showed all the attributes of an aspergian. What is interesting to me is that people, particularly female ones, who have attributes of aspergers syndrome typically ADORE Jane Austen. It is all about not understanding how social systems work. Those of us on the spectrum have to study it. We are interested in understanding it precicely because we don't!

Thanks for writing Jane. Thanks for studying humanity. Thanks for having the sense even though you were born without the sensibilities.

Pun intended.

I love Emma. I wish I was Emma. I think I'm more of a Lydia but internet testing has proved me to be an Elizabeth. There was a time I was Marianne. Marriage cured me of that. Poor Jane. She never married, never had children. I once made the statement that she couldn't have lived in the time she did and be married AND write the way she did. My teenage daughter said I was lying. Poor Jane. She never had teenagers.

Well, we all die. Her words live on. My children will. And they will be blessed by reading her words. They will have reason to continue. A reason to go on living is a good thing. Simple pleasures keep us going sometimes.

I confess. Since my brother's death, I only want hearts and flowers. Nothing deeper than Jane Austen is allowed in my house, social work, psychology and sociology textbooks excluded of course.

I went to lunch with a good friend today. She has told me how blessed I am to be going through my Master's training at the same time I am mourning the loss of my brother. I told her I don't believe it is a coincidence that I am here. It is easier than it would be without the support I am surrounded by, but it isn't an accident or a coincidence. I worked my toushie off to get here.

I'm almost done. Two months left. I feel very accomplished...almost.

Yet a Jane Austen I will never be. Why would I want to? She already did it so well. I have to be me. That is a harry enough job...but I'm up for it!!!!!!!!!

Avoiding Lice and Children

Last week I had a client tell me about a child living in filth with a nasty case of lice. I had to report to CPS. Last night I was awakened by a hideous dream in which my little Pearl, (now 20) was in denial about a terrible case of lice. I spent a few hours surfing the net and discovering what dreams about lice signify. (loss of control in social situations).

Then I discovered the How-to-avoid-lice-on-your-children sites. One enthusiastic blogger-mommy encouraged her readers to teach their children to avoid the "dirty kids" in order to avoid vermin.

When I was a child I got lice. I WAS the dirty kid. I also lived in a third world country for several months with my missionary parents. I brought it home to Delta, Utah and infested my second grade classroom. It was lousy. literally. Yet I would not give up that time in Guatemala and the lessons I learned for anything. Please don't encourage your children to avoid the "dirty kids". Isolating them is not only encouraging cruelty, it can be incredibly damaging to their self images. So what if your children get lice. It won't kill them and perhaps it will give them some empathy for those who don't have it as good as they do.

Shelly Brown once asked to borrow my brush. I told her "no" and told her why. Several years later (we were seniors), we were in the locker room after our cheer/dance class and she asked again. I said, "sure" and handed her my brush. She reminded me of not letting her use my brush in second grade. She thought I was lying about lice. I reminded her of the summer our family spent in Guatemala and told her I really did have lice.

But I also had a much broader perspective of the world than most of my school chums. What a blessing vermin can be.

Avoid Lice

Last week a client told me about her child's lice and the poor living conditions and lack of care because of a negligent father (who has custody). I was awakened at 3 A.M. by a hideous dream in which Pearl had a nasty case of lice and was in complete denial about it.

I looked up websites about dreams about lice. I was told we dream about lice because of fear of

When I was a child I got lice. I WAS the dirty kid. I also lived in a third world country for several months with my missionary parents. I brought it home and infested my second grade classroom. It was lousy. literally. Yet I would not give up that time in Guatemala and the lessons I learned for anything. Please don't encourage your children to avoid the "dirty kids". Isolating them is not only encouraging cruelty, it can be incredibly damaging to their self images. So what if your children get lice. It won't kill them and perhaps it will give them some empathy for those who don't have it as good as they do.

Ode to Fudgesicles

I think that I shall never taste
A treat that adds to line of waist
Quite as yummy as you are
Better than a chocolate bar
Better than both ice and cream
Texture is my fondest dream
How you squeak between my teeth
Cool my tummy underneath
Take me back to childhood
Back when flavors tasted good
Taste buds age and mine are shot
but with you they seem, well, not.

This morning I checked facebook to find that my eleven-year-old niece had written about how her little sis, (who is five), often forgets that their Dad is dead. When she teases her, the little one replies, "I'm gonna tell my Daddy on you!"

I

Thanksgiving Memories

I know how hard it is to have Thanksgiving without your Mom around. Today I put the CD of my Mom's songs in and listened to her voice singing the words she wrote. It was magical. We will always have the memories. Moms and Thanksgiving just seem to go together.

Since I had two, I'm gonna share a few.

My favorite memory of Paula, (my Step-Mom), was how Thanksgiving seemed to be the holiday made just for her. I LOVED to get to set the table for it. She LOVED to cook and we always had her FAMOUS green tomato pickles on Turkey-day. She introduced me to cranberry sauce that DIDN'T come out of a can. She always set the table with her beautiful brown and white expensive china on thanksgiving and it was a very formal affair. We had fruit salad with marshmellows and sour cream and cucumbers in sour cream and amazing stuffing/dressing with little green apples cut up in it. Her turkey was always juicy and never dry and her gravy was phenominal. Her mashed potatoes were made from red potatoes with a few of the skins left in and a scoop of sour cream, plenty of butter and parsely. I think I got to cook with her as much or more than most of you. I learned a few of her secrets.

On Sunday I watched an old episode of The Lawrence Welk Show. It was an old Thanksgiving special. Two of the songs Mama loved and sang often were featured. Sammy watched it with me and I told him his Gran loved those songs. They were "Bless This House" and "My Cup Runneth Over with Love". They were back to back and when the next song started Sam asked if my Mom loved that one too. So cute. Mom was, in my mind, an individual who knew how to express gratitude. She often played and sang those songs and many others that expressed to God and the mortals in her life her gratitude to them. Her fruit salad was amazing too! Green apples, mandarine oranges, pomegranites and whipped cream. Yum! Sierra says I have to make two. One with cream and one without, for her and the other healthy minded people in my fam. party poopers.

Mom used to cook thanksgiving dinners with several different birds. Not just a turkey. I think because Ben went hunting...there was goose, duck and morning doves. That was my favorite T-day of all time!

Ren Lyman's Life in Pictures

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6JEiFZ7Ag6o