12 years after the first time I met Doug, our paths crossed again.
I was practicing with the dance team at Dixie College. We were getting ready for a big performance at a basketball game at Snow College. Our Advisor called my friend Janet over. Janet was the most responsible college aged kid I knew. At 18, she was the manager of Taco Time and made regular car payments. With our Advisor was a guy. Jan and I had been talking about him. You could tell he was cute if it weren’t for the beard and plaid flannel shirt. Especially the beard.
Nothing scratchy about flannel.
Our Advisor asked Janet if she would be willing to give this guy a ride to Snow College. Janet agreed and came back and told me. I thought, “What a mooch”. But I knew it would not affect my status as Jan’s bff. (I was still sitting in the front seat)
Doug sat in the back on the ride to Snow between two gorgeous gals. He was especially interested in the brunette to his left but I was the person who helped him feel comfortable and chatted easily with him on the drive. I guess he was impressed by that. We talked about Delta when he found out that was where I was from. Have you ever noticed that EVERYONE has some connection to Delta? Doug wasn't impressed that I didn't know his brother Dan. He was going to highschool there when our fam did our famous Arizona stint. He entertained us all with stories of Dan's fiascos in Delta.
When questioned about why he needed a ride Doug would simply answer that he was visiting a “friend”. He never mentioned it was a GIRLfriend.
We stopped for a meal at McDonalds and for some strange reason I took a picture of him. I still have it. Doug looking back at me in a beard and plaid flannel.
Fast forward several months.
There was this really cute guy in two of my classes. His name was Rick Congdon. He was not a member of the church and I was always trying to convert him. We had speech and swim together. We debated evolution and saw each other in our bathing suits. He kept telling me about this friend of his. He said we would be perfect for each other and wanted to set us up.
As if.
One day he drove past my apartment as I was walking home and said he was having a barbecue and his friend would be there and I just had to come. I was busy. I said no. He kept it up and finally I gave in and a date was set for a Saturday toward the end of the school year.
Rick brought his friend into Taco Time to meet me. He had previously pointed me out on campus to Doug and they even said “hi” to me as I went past. Doug says I greeted him too. I have no recollection of this.
But I remember the Taco Time meeting. His beard was gone and his hair was blonder. He basically looked like your typical St. George Haughty. He and Rick were really into weight lifting and liked to show off their muscles.
I was enticed but cautious.
On our first date I saw naked people everywhere. I took it as a sign that this guy was entirely too worldly for me. We drove down to Vegas (I’m not sure I had ever been), and we saw Michael Angelo’s David, then a gal at the side of the pool was sunbathing topless and on the way home we stopped at a swimming hole only to catch some Mexicans enjoying a skinny dip.
Phee-you
After that, we spent lots of time together. Four days to be exact. We basically went on four dates in four days. I discovered he had just joined the speech team. So had I but I made sure he knew I was joining it anyway. (I didn’t want him to think I was following him around.)
I helped him with his campaign as he ran for vice president of the student body. I spelled his name wrong on a poster. Never thinking one day that name would be mine.
Aunt Lollie and baby Jake
I can't wait to be a Grandma!!!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
Doug is at the Iron Dog in Alaska. I miss him...
How I met Doug
The first time we met I was about 7 and he was around 12. I remember lying on the warm cement by the side of the city pool in Delta. It was the most wonderful place to be in the summertime. The cement was warmed by the sun and it felt great to just lay there and soak it up, even as a 7 year old. The only thing I didn’t like about going swimming at the city pool is that the lifeguards all took note when the Lyman kids came in because they had to keep an eye out for Robin. He had a cork in his tracheotomy tube and could drown if the cork came out. (Puts a new twist on the phrase, “put a cork in it”, doesn’t it?) Knowing that the lifeguards were all very aware was one thing, but having to bear the embarrassment of a whistle blow and yell, “Everybody out of the pool! Robin Lyman lost his cork!”, was something else in deed.
I remember the mix of emotion as I watched Robin and the lifeguard look for the black rubber cork. On one hand my beloved bro could DIE by getting water in the hole in his neck and on the other hand I could die of embarrassment.
But that’s another story.
In the end I decided I would much rather have Robin and the embarrassment wasn’t really that big of a deal.
The city pool was one of the few places where kids could play at adult social interaction. Mostly, I observed. But I learned a lot in my observing. One day, I noticed a group of boys who were older than me. They had taken over the diving board and were having a ball showing off and doing flips and dives that put us home folk to shame. I was impressed with their athletic ability but completely turned off by the audacious way they acted. They shouted and walked and dived in a very cocky manner. But they were interesting enough that I remembered watching them and wondering who they were.
Years later, Doug would tell me of his summer visits to his Aunt Dorothy’s house and trips to the swimming pool. I have to let my imagination fill in the gaps, but I doubt he gave a second glance to a skinny seven-year old who belly flopped off the end of the board and doggy paddled to the side.
But I can’t help but wonder and I can’t WAIT to see the great video tape in the sky that Heavenly Father keeps in his family room.
The first time we met I was about 7 and he was around 12. I remember lying on the warm cement by the side of the city pool in Delta. It was the most wonderful place to be in the summertime. The cement was warmed by the sun and it felt great to just lay there and soak it up, even as a 7 year old. The only thing I didn’t like about going swimming at the city pool is that the lifeguards all took note when the Lyman kids came in because they had to keep an eye out for Robin. He had a cork in his tracheotomy tube and could drown if the cork came out. (Puts a new twist on the phrase, “put a cork in it”, doesn’t it?) Knowing that the lifeguards were all very aware was one thing, but having to bear the embarrassment of a whistle blow and yell, “Everybody out of the pool! Robin Lyman lost his cork!”, was something else in deed.
I remember the mix of emotion as I watched Robin and the lifeguard look for the black rubber cork. On one hand my beloved bro could DIE by getting water in the hole in his neck and on the other hand I could die of embarrassment.
But that’s another story.
In the end I decided I would much rather have Robin and the embarrassment wasn’t really that big of a deal.
The city pool was one of the few places where kids could play at adult social interaction. Mostly, I observed. But I learned a lot in my observing. One day, I noticed a group of boys who were older than me. They had taken over the diving board and were having a ball showing off and doing flips and dives that put us home folk to shame. I was impressed with their athletic ability but completely turned off by the audacious way they acted. They shouted and walked and dived in a very cocky manner. But they were interesting enough that I remembered watching them and wondering who they were.
Years later, Doug would tell me of his summer visits to his Aunt Dorothy’s house and trips to the swimming pool. I have to let my imagination fill in the gaps, but I doubt he gave a second glance to a skinny seven-year old who belly flopped off the end of the board and doggy paddled to the side.
But I can’t help but wonder and I can’t WAIT to see the great video tape in the sky that Heavenly Father keeps in his family room.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Melvin Lyman M.D. on Homosexuality
I have to give an oral presentation on conversion therapy which is where a therapist tells a client being homosexual is all about behavior and choice and you can be therapized out of it.
I have to present about the ethical issues behind 'forcing' clients into hetrosexuality. In other words, it is wrong to tell a person it isn't right to be gay or lesbian.
I really don't know where I stand on the issue.
There are studies that "prove" a genetic or physiological component of homosexuality and there are studies that "prove" it is all about behavior.
So I'm figuring it all out. Last night I couldn't sleep for anything. I opened about 12 different books and couldn't really get into any of them. I'm so sick of textbooks.
Then I came across my dad's book, Confessions of a Country Doctor. I lay awake for two more hours reading about adventures in medicine. My Dad was an amazing man. You know the movie It's a Wonderful Life? Well, my dad was the George Bailey of family practice medicine.
Here is what he wrote about homosexuality:
The Big Lie - Justifying Perversion
Homosexuals have made it very clear that by juxtaposing their lifestyle to "civil rights" they expect to gain equality. Their argument goes something as follows, "I was born gay and therefore I cannot be expected to act contrary to my nature. Therefore, when government, the military, or even private individuals or institutions impose restrictions on my basic nature, I am denied a civil right to equal treatment under the law." Our media and others find these arguments persuasive and even fair-minded, bit they are simply not true. The small percentage of people who have the tendency to homosexuality is not one bit different than similar small groups who have tendencies to other perverse activity.
What is Perverse?
Webster's Unabridged Dictionary of the English Language defines "perverted":
1) Changed to or being of an unnatural or abnormal kind; 2) Turned from what is right; wicked; misguided; distorted.
Will Durant wrote a very powerful book, the Lessons of History. In his chapter "Biology and History," he states categorically, "The third biological lesson of history is that life must breed. Nature has no use for organisms, variations, or groups that cannot reproduce abundantly."
By labeling homosexual practice as "perverse" or "Unnatural," we must be fair and quickly remember that it is only one form of perversion. Consider gluttony and kleptomania. Both are innate tendencies which pose particular and, at times, overwhelming problems to the people affected by them, but when acted upon, leave an entirely different effect on society at large. The problem for society comes when a particular form of perverse activity is given moral equivalence to nonperversion. Since we cited it already, let's use kleptomania as an example. If I am caught stealing due to this overwhelming human tendency which I couldn't resist, should I be allowed to whip out my Official Kleptomaniac's Card, show it to the floor walker at the department store and then expect an apology because he collared me adn violated my civil rights? Aren't these all well-known tendencies among the population at large, and couldn't a case be made that each of them might well affect a percentage of the whole equality idea that is currently claimed by the homosexuals?
He goes on. But you get the general idea.
What do you think? I'm forming an opinion. and a powerpoint.
I have to present about the ethical issues behind 'forcing' clients into hetrosexuality. In other words, it is wrong to tell a person it isn't right to be gay or lesbian.
I really don't know where I stand on the issue.
There are studies that "prove" a genetic or physiological component of homosexuality and there are studies that "prove" it is all about behavior.
So I'm figuring it all out. Last night I couldn't sleep for anything. I opened about 12 different books and couldn't really get into any of them. I'm so sick of textbooks.
Then I came across my dad's book, Confessions of a Country Doctor. I lay awake for two more hours reading about adventures in medicine. My Dad was an amazing man. You know the movie It's a Wonderful Life? Well, my dad was the George Bailey of family practice medicine.
Here is what he wrote about homosexuality:
The Big Lie - Justifying Perversion
Homosexuals have made it very clear that by juxtaposing their lifestyle to "civil rights" they expect to gain equality. Their argument goes something as follows, "I was born gay and therefore I cannot be expected to act contrary to my nature. Therefore, when government, the military, or even private individuals or institutions impose restrictions on my basic nature, I am denied a civil right to equal treatment under the law." Our media and others find these arguments persuasive and even fair-minded, bit they are simply not true. The small percentage of people who have the tendency to homosexuality is not one bit different than similar small groups who have tendencies to other perverse activity.
What is Perverse?
Webster's Unabridged Dictionary of the English Language defines "perverted":
1) Changed to or being of an unnatural or abnormal kind; 2) Turned from what is right; wicked; misguided; distorted.
Will Durant wrote a very powerful book, the Lessons of History. In his chapter "Biology and History," he states categorically, "The third biological lesson of history is that life must breed. Nature has no use for organisms, variations, or groups that cannot reproduce abundantly."
By labeling homosexual practice as "perverse" or "Unnatural," we must be fair and quickly remember that it is only one form of perversion. Consider gluttony and kleptomania. Both are innate tendencies which pose particular and, at times, overwhelming problems to the people affected by them, but when acted upon, leave an entirely different effect on society at large. The problem for society comes when a particular form of perverse activity is given moral equivalence to nonperversion. Since we cited it already, let's use kleptomania as an example. If I am caught stealing due to this overwhelming human tendency which I couldn't resist, should I be allowed to whip out my Official Kleptomaniac's Card, show it to the floor walker at the department store and then expect an apology because he collared me adn violated my civil rights? Aren't these all well-known tendencies among the population at large, and couldn't a case be made that each of them might well affect a percentage of the whole equality idea that is currently claimed by the homosexuals?
He goes on. But you get the general idea.
What do you think? I'm forming an opinion. and a powerpoint.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Alaska Songs
I'm missing Alaska today. Doug is up there running the Iron Dog. Here are some song about my old home state:
Nuka, Nuka (sung to "Daisy, Daisy" or "Bycicle built for Two")
note: Mistrukas are nesting dolls, Nuka means 'little sister' and a bidarka is the Russian name for kayak.
Nuka, Nuka
Warm in her coat of fur
My mistruka
will be carved just for her
It won’t be a lonely winter
we've polished off each splinter
and you'll look sweet
tucked in your seat
of a bidarka built for two
Sled Dogs (Sung to the tune "School Days")
Sled dogs, sled dogs
sleep without a bed dogs
curled up tight in a ball of fur
you don't complain while I'm saying 'brrr'
I was the dude behind the sled
Salmon in tow to keep you fed
Since you pulled me to Nome
no kids are dead
so thanks for the ride of my life!
Mush Little Doggies (sung to the tune "Hush Little Baby")
Mush little doggies
hurry along
You'll reach Nome
while I'm singin' this song
Curl up tight when the
wind begins to blow
Don't be deterred by
the ice and snow
Mush little doggies
don't you bark
I can start a fire
with a single spark
You can eat dried salmon
I'll have the stew
a tent for me
and a coat of fur for you
Nuka, Nuka (sung to "Daisy, Daisy" or "Bycicle built for Two")
note: Mistrukas are nesting dolls, Nuka means 'little sister' and a bidarka is the Russian name for kayak.
Nuka, Nuka
Warm in her coat of fur
My mistruka
will be carved just for her
It won’t be a lonely winter
we've polished off each splinter
and you'll look sweet
tucked in your seat
of a bidarka built for two
Sled Dogs (Sung to the tune "School Days")
Sled dogs, sled dogs
sleep without a bed dogs
curled up tight in a ball of fur
you don't complain while I'm saying 'brrr'
I was the dude behind the sled
Salmon in tow to keep you fed
Since you pulled me to Nome
no kids are dead
so thanks for the ride of my life!
Mush Little Doggies (sung to the tune "Hush Little Baby")
Mush little doggies
hurry along
You'll reach Nome
while I'm singin' this song
Curl up tight when the
wind begins to blow
Don't be deterred by
the ice and snow
Mush little doggies
don't you bark
I can start a fire
with a single spark
You can eat dried salmon
I'll have the stew
a tent for me
and a coat of fur for you
Monday, February 15, 2010
On Moving All Over the Planet
At last count I have lived in eight different states and moved countless times
The state I’ve lived in most is the state of limbo. Wondering where the next place we are going to move is.
It’s not that my mate is a derelict or running from the law or anything as remotely interesting as that. No. he is a radiation oncologist. A doc who nukes people for a living and can only live where there is a million dollar piece of equipment used soley for the nuking of people. Consequently, we have to live where a population not only has a high incidence of cancer but a population base high enough to warrant a radiation oncologist in its midst.
I’m an almost social worker. I can pretty much live anywhere and get paid squat. But we live off the money he makes and for some strange reason, the kids like food, fuel and shelter.
I’ve become an expert on packing up and shipping out. In past generations, mothers didn’t bond with infants because they knew the chances of the child not living very long were pretty good. Why bond when you could lose that bond so readily? The same phenomenon has taken place with neighbors. I have learned through self-preservation not to get too close to the folks I live next to. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I say hello and accept halibut and take over Christmas goodies and attend the occasional garage sale. But we don’t have dinners together.
Forrest Gump put it best when he said, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get.” Well, I’m one of those chocolate eaters who takes a bite and if I don’t like what I get, I put it back and try another one. If I’m in the mood for caramel and I get nougat, I keep trying. If I’m in the mood for nut and I get caramel, I’ve been known to leave the caramel and take a bite of nut, even though I actually LIKE caramel.
Every box of chocolates given to me for Christmas, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, and Birthdays, (my sweetheart isn’t much for shopping) is thrown away with half eaten chocolates. Unless, of course, the kids get to them.
So, if life IS like a box of chocolate, maybe people can be classified into types of chocolate eaters. If you are the type who studies the underside of the lid in order to discover the mystery of the insides of the chocolate, you are likely to be the kind of person who studies maps, googles school districts, emails chambers of commerces before choosing where to live and actually staying there. If you are the kind of person who takes a bite and feels like you have to finish it, whether you like it or not, besides weighing more than you should, you are likely to be the kind of person who digs in where you are and sticks it out, whether you actually like the area or not.
But if you are like me, you not only eat chocolate in a random way, you move fairly often.
The state I’ve lived in most is the state of limbo. Wondering where the next place we are going to move is.
It’s not that my mate is a derelict or running from the law or anything as remotely interesting as that. No. he is a radiation oncologist. A doc who nukes people for a living and can only live where there is a million dollar piece of equipment used soley for the nuking of people. Consequently, we have to live where a population not only has a high incidence of cancer but a population base high enough to warrant a radiation oncologist in its midst.
I’m an almost social worker. I can pretty much live anywhere and get paid squat. But we live off the money he makes and for some strange reason, the kids like food, fuel and shelter.
I’ve become an expert on packing up and shipping out. In past generations, mothers didn’t bond with infants because they knew the chances of the child not living very long were pretty good. Why bond when you could lose that bond so readily? The same phenomenon has taken place with neighbors. I have learned through self-preservation not to get too close to the folks I live next to. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I say hello and accept halibut and take over Christmas goodies and attend the occasional garage sale. But we don’t have dinners together.
Forrest Gump put it best when he said, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get.” Well, I’m one of those chocolate eaters who takes a bite and if I don’t like what I get, I put it back and try another one. If I’m in the mood for caramel and I get nougat, I keep trying. If I’m in the mood for nut and I get caramel, I’ve been known to leave the caramel and take a bite of nut, even though I actually LIKE caramel.
Every box of chocolates given to me for Christmas, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, and Birthdays, (my sweetheart isn’t much for shopping) is thrown away with half eaten chocolates. Unless, of course, the kids get to them.
So, if life IS like a box of chocolate, maybe people can be classified into types of chocolate eaters. If you are the type who studies the underside of the lid in order to discover the mystery of the insides of the chocolate, you are likely to be the kind of person who studies maps, googles school districts, emails chambers of commerces before choosing where to live and actually staying there. If you are the kind of person who takes a bite and feels like you have to finish it, whether you like it or not, besides weighing more than you should, you are likely to be the kind of person who digs in where you are and sticks it out, whether you actually like the area or not.
But if you are like me, you not only eat chocolate in a random way, you move fairly often.
Love Day
My valentines day was mildly dissappointing. Except for the amazing valentine from an adorable little girl at church. When I showed it to the men in my life...(Doug and my three boys), They all looked fairly sheepish. Joey said it looked like the picture Napoleon Dynomite drew for LaFondah. I know. He got the characters mixed up. I loved it. It was a portrait of me. Yes my lips were huge and orange, but there was evidence of great care in drawing it and it was the ONLY valentine I recieved.
I know. What am I complaining about? Doug took me to Maui. Lila gave me a chocolate truffle. Joey and Christian wrote on candy from their classroom stash. The most fun I had with V-day was the creation of care-packages for my girls in college. I sent them treats from Hawaii along with stuffed animals of the valentine variety, hotpads, jewelry and dish towels. It is true. It is more blessed to give than to recieve.
But I think I will go out and get a nice boquet of roses and tell Doug that is what he got for me for valentine's day.
I know. What am I complaining about? Doug took me to Maui. Lila gave me a chocolate truffle. Joey and Christian wrote on candy from their classroom stash. The most fun I had with V-day was the creation of care-packages for my girls in college. I sent them treats from Hawaii along with stuffed animals of the valentine variety, hotpads, jewelry and dish towels. It is true. It is more blessed to give than to recieve.
But I think I will go out and get a nice boquet of roses and tell Doug that is what he got for me for valentine's day.
Friday, February 12, 2010
In Honor of the Olympics 2010
Okay bleaders. Now don't freak out. I gave in.
Yes.
It happened.
I hooked up the antenna to our living room television.
What can I say. I'm 100% marshmellow. My boys wanted to watch the Olympics. Hey now. Don't be like that! I didn't go back on my word. I'm still cableless!!!
He he he he
Now don't get all worried that I am going to give in to the Oprah side of the force or anything like unto it. Namely, Ellen.
These never held the attraction to me the history channel and HGTV did. Not to worry.
And thankfully, Sponge Bob is still banned from the home!
Yes.
It happened.
I hooked up the antenna to our living room television.
What can I say. I'm 100% marshmellow. My boys wanted to watch the Olympics. Hey now. Don't be like that! I didn't go back on my word. I'm still cableless!!!
He he he he
Now don't get all worried that I am going to give in to the Oprah side of the force or anything like unto it. Namely, Ellen.
These never held the attraction to me the history channel and HGTV did. Not to worry.
And thankfully, Sponge Bob is still banned from the home!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Montana Women's Prison
I had an epiphany. Yesterday I met with my practicum supervisor. We talked about the possibility of starting a Toastmaster’s club in the woman’s prison. Since it came up, I’ve had signs placed in front of me time and again that there is some amazing work to be done within the prison.
I read an article in the Ensign about Joseph Smith’s experience in liberty jail. I was explaining to my daughter what I learned and I heard myself say, “when your body is imprisoned your heart and mind are freed up to learn.” (Isn’t it interesting the things you hear yourself say when you teach by the spirit).
I read an article online about the toastmaster’s club in the Montana woman’s prison from 2003. It spoke of the amazing growth these women experienced as a result of participating in public speaking in a safe setting. Their confidence soared as they experienced success in front of an audience and their future job skills were enhanced as they learned to carry themselves verbally and non.
I’m so ashamed of myself. Before I read this article, I found myself stereotyping these women in my mind rather than allowing them to be unique individuals.
Another intern told me of an acquaintance who was an inmate and told her, “You have no idea what an important work The Family Tree is doing by helping the women in prison learn to parent, coaching them through their childbirth experiences and creating the opportunity for them to spend time with their children.”
When she spoke of that, I thought about Christ’s words to his disciples in Matthew 25
"When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory: And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth [his] sheep from the goats: And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.
Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] unto me.
What an amazing opportunity I have. To work with these precious women!!!!!!!!
Note to self:
1. Expect them to live up to their full potential
2. Remember they have likely lived in situations where they have been prone to manipulate and keep your guard up, but love them too.
3. I know, tricky balance, but you can do it!!!!!!!!!!!
I read an article in the Ensign about Joseph Smith’s experience in liberty jail. I was explaining to my daughter what I learned and I heard myself say, “when your body is imprisoned your heart and mind are freed up to learn.” (Isn’t it interesting the things you hear yourself say when you teach by the spirit).
I read an article online about the toastmaster’s club in the Montana woman’s prison from 2003. It spoke of the amazing growth these women experienced as a result of participating in public speaking in a safe setting. Their confidence soared as they experienced success in front of an audience and their future job skills were enhanced as they learned to carry themselves verbally and non.
I’m so ashamed of myself. Before I read this article, I found myself stereotyping these women in my mind rather than allowing them to be unique individuals.
Another intern told me of an acquaintance who was an inmate and told her, “You have no idea what an important work The Family Tree is doing by helping the women in prison learn to parent, coaching them through their childbirth experiences and creating the opportunity for them to spend time with their children.”
When she spoke of that, I thought about Christ’s words to his disciples in Matthew 25
"When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory: And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth [his] sheep from the goats: And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.
Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] unto me.
What an amazing opportunity I have. To work with these precious women!!!!!!!!
Note to self:
1. Expect them to live up to their full potential
2. Remember they have likely lived in situations where they have been prone to manipulate and keep your guard up, but love them too.
3. I know, tricky balance, but you can do it!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Finding Faith
Can faith be found in concrete things?
Crosses, prayer shawls, rosary beads
Yamikas, CTR rings
Wayward coins and mustard seeds
Can faith be found in doing good?
Casseroles and bended knees
Doing things that Jesus would
Calming arguments and seas?
Can faith be just a simple thought?
Planted, but not just left there
Just a meager speck of hope
Nurtured, tended with great care
My faith is still rather small
Just a seedling in my heart
It will blossom, bloom and grow
If I choose the better part
by Laura Debenham
Crosses, prayer shawls, rosary beads
Yamikas, CTR rings
Wayward coins and mustard seeds
Can faith be found in doing good?
Casseroles and bended knees
Doing things that Jesus would
Calming arguments and seas?
Can faith be just a simple thought?
Planted, but not just left there
Just a meager speck of hope
Nurtured, tended with great care
My faith is still rather small
Just a seedling in my heart
It will blossom, bloom and grow
If I choose the better part
by Laura Debenham
Valentines Day Newsletter AKA news - later
Dear Friends and Fam,
Hello from the Montana Debenhams previously known as the Alaska Debenhams. We are living in our 8th State. We are slow up here in the colder climates. When we left Alaska one of you said we are moving to the only state colder. How very prophetic. Molecules move slower in the cold. I remember Max Rose teaching me this fact by pointing out that boiling water bubbles because those molecules are jumping around while cold makes them hold still and freeze. My excuse for sending out a Valentine newsletter instead of Christmas is the weather. So much for global warming. It is 12 degrees below zero right now. We bought a house in a great neighborhood that was built in 1973. We love it but it is a project. We are hoping it will build some character in three strong-willed-in-need-of-projects-to-channel-energy Debenham boys.
Doug was thrilled to have more time off but that didn’t last long. He is now working two jobs to support five college goers. He is three days a week in Vegas and two days a week in Billings. We miss him but my adorable 21 year old niece Susannah moved in and is keeping us from being lonely. On weekends Doug makes up for lost time by taking the boys skiing and shoveling snow. He spent weeks finishing our driveway and is planning on taking on our tennis court as soon as the snow melts. Speaking of finishing…Doug finished all of the Board requirements and the St. George Marathon. He came in 25 seconds from qualifying for the Boston Marathon at 3:36:24 (For those of you who don’t speak marathonese, that is 3 hours, 36 minutes and 24 seconds).
Lollie mourned the loss of Lila when she went off to BYU Idaho. She sat in Lila’s empty bedroom looking at old pictures and sobbing and writing sappy poetry for three days after which she pulled herself up by the snoopy socks and enrolled in grad school. She is studying Social Work this time. Check out her blog for details of life from Lol’s laughing out loud perspective. Try not to laugh. I double dog dare ya. Lauradebenham.blogspot.com
James and Marie (24 & 24) are engaged!! They will marry sometime next year. Bren proposed on Christmas day. Em is finishing her degree in either Vegas or Flagstaff so they only have one more winter left in Alaska. They are both at UAA fulltime and holding down jobs as waiters. Bren also sings and plays pianos for weddings and corporate events. We miss them both like crazy and not just their gourmet cooking!
Elizabeth (21) is graduating from BYU with her Bachelor’s in Social Work in April. For part of her internship she directed a choir made up of disabled young men who all adored her. Rach was released from her RS prez calling and moved to a cute little duplex for her last semester. She sings and plays the flute for the Celtic choir and will be going to Scotland this summer to perform with them. After which she is considering serving a mission to who knows where. Nervous Moms like kids close.
Pearl (19) bonked her head. She spent the summer studying traumatic brain injuries at the Montreal Neurological Institute, got back to BYU and promptly smashed her precious helmetless skull against the unforgiving concrete of a campus sidewalk while rushing to her pre-med club on a bike. She didn’t know who she was for several hours but is back to her mega-cerebral self and is majoring in Neuro Science and taking the MCAT in the spring. If you see her riding by without a helmet…feel free to nag.
Brianne (18) completed her first quarter at BYU Idaho which she loved and her Mom survived. She got a guitar for Christmas and was thrilled. Her music is amazing. I can’t help it that my eyes leak when she sings and plays. Something is seriously wrong with my tear ducts. They are directly connected to Lila’s voice. Since she is on the quarter system, she gets winter quarter off. We get three whole months to bask in Lila light. Lucky Billings gets Lila too. Little brothers are rejoicing along with Mom and Dad.
Doug Junior (12) is almost as tall as his mom. In July, in anticipation of puberty, Spencer’s appendix exploded. Nothing like having your innards bail out of the oncoming madness to usher in adolescents. We actually got him to the hospital before all of his internal organs were infected but not soon enough to protect the colon so Spence was hospitalized for several days doing intense antibiotics, (sound familiar?), and had his appendix removed several weeks later. He has recovered fully, was called as deacon quorum president, loves the Beatles and is living to snowboard powder at red lodge.
Joseph (10) has discovered racquetball & Mom is thrilled to see his energy channeled. He is thrilled, (along with his brothers), to be in a school that doesn’t require uniforms. Mom and Dad still insist on haircuts which is a trial but Drew carries on, shorn or not. He got a Wii from Santa & is highly motivated with the promise of game time. Drew writes clever poetry, plays piano & has more energy than the herd of deer in our yard.
Christian (8) is the unpublished author of two thick chapter books. He has a serious Calvin and Hobbs addiction and will only practice the piano when Mom says he has to in order to go on to more fun activities such as writing, reading, computing and frolicking with his brothers. Sam was baptized in July and was relieved to know he could repent weekly after having that first load of sins washed away.
Annah(21) is the newest member of our family. She graduated from Snow College with her A.S. & moved in with us. She is keeping us from being lonely with Doug gone so much. She is looking for a job in Montana & is hoping to attend more college here. She is a joy to have around as is only right since her middle name is Joy!!! Ah, labels.
Brinkley (18 months) found the Frisbees Santa was hiding and gave us no peace. He lives to play catch and produces no tears (because he is such a happy doggie), so we have to squeeze them into his eyes 3 times a day. Poor little Fairbanks native doesn’t understand warm weather and seems relieved when there is snow.
That is the news.
Hello from the Montana Debenhams previously known as the Alaska Debenhams. We are living in our 8th State. We are slow up here in the colder climates. When we left Alaska one of you said we are moving to the only state colder. How very prophetic. Molecules move slower in the cold. I remember Max Rose teaching me this fact by pointing out that boiling water bubbles because those molecules are jumping around while cold makes them hold still and freeze. My excuse for sending out a Valentine newsletter instead of Christmas is the weather. So much for global warming. It is 12 degrees below zero right now. We bought a house in a great neighborhood that was built in 1973. We love it but it is a project. We are hoping it will build some character in three strong-willed-in-need-of-projects-to-channel-energy Debenham boys.
Doug was thrilled to have more time off but that didn’t last long. He is now working two jobs to support five college goers. He is three days a week in Vegas and two days a week in Billings. We miss him but my adorable 21 year old niece Susannah moved in and is keeping us from being lonely. On weekends Doug makes up for lost time by taking the boys skiing and shoveling snow. He spent weeks finishing our driveway and is planning on taking on our tennis court as soon as the snow melts. Speaking of finishing…Doug finished all of the Board requirements and the St. George Marathon. He came in 25 seconds from qualifying for the Boston Marathon at 3:36:24 (For those of you who don’t speak marathonese, that is 3 hours, 36 minutes and 24 seconds).
Lollie mourned the loss of Lila when she went off to BYU Idaho. She sat in Lila’s empty bedroom looking at old pictures and sobbing and writing sappy poetry for three days after which she pulled herself up by the snoopy socks and enrolled in grad school. She is studying Social Work this time. Check out her blog for details of life from Lol’s laughing out loud perspective. Try not to laugh. I double dog dare ya. Lauradebenham.blogspot.com
James and Marie (24 & 24) are engaged!! They will marry sometime next year. Bren proposed on Christmas day. Em is finishing her degree in either Vegas or Flagstaff so they only have one more winter left in Alaska. They are both at UAA fulltime and holding down jobs as waiters. Bren also sings and plays pianos for weddings and corporate events. We miss them both like crazy and not just their gourmet cooking!
Elizabeth (21) is graduating from BYU with her Bachelor’s in Social Work in April. For part of her internship she directed a choir made up of disabled young men who all adored her. Rach was released from her RS prez calling and moved to a cute little duplex for her last semester. She sings and plays the flute for the Celtic choir and will be going to Scotland this summer to perform with them. After which she is considering serving a mission to who knows where. Nervous Moms like kids close.
Pearl (19) bonked her head. She spent the summer studying traumatic brain injuries at the Montreal Neurological Institute, got back to BYU and promptly smashed her precious helmetless skull against the unforgiving concrete of a campus sidewalk while rushing to her pre-med club on a bike. She didn’t know who she was for several hours but is back to her mega-cerebral self and is majoring in Neuro Science and taking the MCAT in the spring. If you see her riding by without a helmet…feel free to nag.
Brianne (18) completed her first quarter at BYU Idaho which she loved and her Mom survived. She got a guitar for Christmas and was thrilled. Her music is amazing. I can’t help it that my eyes leak when she sings and plays. Something is seriously wrong with my tear ducts. They are directly connected to Lila’s voice. Since she is on the quarter system, she gets winter quarter off. We get three whole months to bask in Lila light. Lucky Billings gets Lila too. Little brothers are rejoicing along with Mom and Dad.
Doug Junior (12) is almost as tall as his mom. In July, in anticipation of puberty, Spencer’s appendix exploded. Nothing like having your innards bail out of the oncoming madness to usher in adolescents. We actually got him to the hospital before all of his internal organs were infected but not soon enough to protect the colon so Spence was hospitalized for several days doing intense antibiotics, (sound familiar?), and had his appendix removed several weeks later. He has recovered fully, was called as deacon quorum president, loves the Beatles and is living to snowboard powder at red lodge.
Joseph (10) has discovered racquetball & Mom is thrilled to see his energy channeled. He is thrilled, (along with his brothers), to be in a school that doesn’t require uniforms. Mom and Dad still insist on haircuts which is a trial but Drew carries on, shorn or not. He got a Wii from Santa & is highly motivated with the promise of game time. Drew writes clever poetry, plays piano & has more energy than the herd of deer in our yard.
Christian (8) is the unpublished author of two thick chapter books. He has a serious Calvin and Hobbs addiction and will only practice the piano when Mom says he has to in order to go on to more fun activities such as writing, reading, computing and frolicking with his brothers. Sam was baptized in July and was relieved to know he could repent weekly after having that first load of sins washed away.
Annah(21) is the newest member of our family. She graduated from Snow College with her A.S. & moved in with us. She is keeping us from being lonely with Doug gone so much. She is looking for a job in Montana & is hoping to attend more college here. She is a joy to have around as is only right since her middle name is Joy!!! Ah, labels.
Brinkley (18 months) found the Frisbees Santa was hiding and gave us no peace. He lives to play catch and produces no tears (because he is such a happy doggie), so we have to squeeze them into his eyes 3 times a day. Poor little Fairbanks native doesn’t understand warm weather and seems relieved when there is snow.
That is the news.
Monday, February 8, 2010
It has been one of those days
I'd rather not blog about it. So I won't. How 'bout if I blog about an imaginary day?
Okay.
This morning I woke up to a lovely day of sunshine, blue skies, a loving husband and a swimming pool in my back yard. The weather is a perfect 70 degrees. I slipped into my size 6 bikini and effortlessly swam 40 laps. I made a perfect breakfast for the entire family and cleaned everything before I left for school.
My children are sweet and kind and always obedient. They never fight or quarrel one with another and constantly complement each other. They are endlessly grateful for the work I do and the things I sacrifice for them. My school work is easy because I am so devistatingly brilliant. My professors are all amazed by my work and whisper reverently to each other in awe when I walk past. My fellow students respect my opinions and enjoy my friendship.
I have a fabulous job and my work is rewarding and I am well paid for my efforts. My supervisors at my practicum are amazed at my wisdom and skill and allow me abundant opportunities to demonstrate my talents and change lives right and left.
I am thin and blond and devistatingly gorgeous. I have truckloads of money and I can't find enough places to spend it all. My wardrobe is all name brand and my home is clean, beautiful and well kept.
Did I mention the pool?
Okay.
This morning I woke up to a lovely day of sunshine, blue skies, a loving husband and a swimming pool in my back yard. The weather is a perfect 70 degrees. I slipped into my size 6 bikini and effortlessly swam 40 laps. I made a perfect breakfast for the entire family and cleaned everything before I left for school.
My children are sweet and kind and always obedient. They never fight or quarrel one with another and constantly complement each other. They are endlessly grateful for the work I do and the things I sacrifice for them. My school work is easy because I am so devistatingly brilliant. My professors are all amazed by my work and whisper reverently to each other in awe when I walk past. My fellow students respect my opinions and enjoy my friendship.
I have a fabulous job and my work is rewarding and I am well paid for my efforts. My supervisors at my practicum are amazed at my wisdom and skill and allow me abundant opportunities to demonstrate my talents and change lives right and left.
I am thin and blond and devistatingly gorgeous. I have truckloads of money and I can't find enough places to spend it all. My wardrobe is all name brand and my home is clean, beautiful and well kept.
Did I mention the pool?
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Hawaii Hotel with my Hunny
I'm in a hotel in Hawaii with my hunny. Now you know my commitment to not watch television doesn't count when I'm in a hotel room. Doug and I have been watching Man Verses Food. It is the latest insanity on the travel channel where this crazy guy goes around to different resturants and accepts their food challenges. A food challenge is to eat a 876 pound hamburger with a 12 gallon milkshake or some equally gluttonous goal. It is beyond sick and twisted. I think the Alquida shows this program to the middle eastern countries to show them just how degenerate Americans are. They don't even have to lie.
I realize that I'm missing out on a ton of popular culture by banishing television from my life.
I don't really think I'm missing much.
I think I'll leave it off tomorrow and get out and enjoy Maui.
I realize that I'm missing out on a ton of popular culture by banishing television from my life.
I don't really think I'm missing much.
I think I'll leave it off tomorrow and get out and enjoy Maui.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Process Recording the Group Experience
Description of group setting (purpose of group)
In our group therapy class we split up into small groups of four people. We were discussing our handout about the priorities individuals have in groups. I initially wrote that “pleasing” was my number one priority. Boy was I mistaken. We talked about our individual goals and after a while we all get together in one big group and talked about what we had learned. The names are changed to protect the innocent.
Group purpose/process in terms of member roles, social interactions & behavior
Dr. Cinnamon was the facilitator and he asked Bill to share his small group experience. So Bill starts to tell how Camille was feeling compromised at work by men who seem to take advantage of her youth and beauty and say demeaning things to her. Bill began to talk about how he helped Camille to see her own worth by sharing the lyrics of a Tupoc rap song. At this point I was mentally rolling my eyes at the audacity of Bill (a white male who makes constant cracks that are demeaning to women and other minorities), to make things better for Camille. It was incredibly offensive and sexist to me. The fact that it was a rap song, (which is a style typically demeaning of women), in a graduate level academic setting was almost comical in my mind.
I can’t remember all I said, but in a nutshell, I told Bill he was a misogynistic male chauvinist. I told him he couldn’t possibly understand Camille’s perspective and to talk to her the way he did wasn’t the least bit empowering. (Which, of course, put the whole class on defensive). Several people made comments and the discussion turned to the cultural attitudes that are demeaning to women. I addressed the nickname assigned to Camille and voiced my concern at an individual being called after a snack food. Camille seemed miffed that I was discounting the men who were rescuing her. But what I felt was an attack of all men. In my mind I was all women and I was standing up for myself and my daughters and every blind woman in the room who doesn’t get how marginalized we are as a group.
Student’s internal experience (personal thoughts and feelings)
I can’t even remember everything everyone said. What I do remember, is the horrible feeling of other people thinking I was the problem. Someone else told me that everyone came away from it feeling worse rather than better. We stereotyped each other, and I’m the one who started it. How could I have done it differently? We all fell into a group mentality. Even I, the scapegoat, felt like it was okay that I was being used to help further everyone else’s education.
One of the most important things I’ve learned so far in this class is that group therapy’s goal is to model a functional family. We did the classic dysfunctional family thing. Alice was the only one who acknowledged that there was something seriously wrong with this exercise. She pointed out that I was being a scapegoat.
Later on that evening Alice wrote on facebook “Today’s group was the Mailgram experiment.” One class member did what alcoholic families do when they deny that there is a problem. She told Alice to just go to bed. I broke the rule of acknowledging that there is something wrong by pointing out the sexism of our culture.
I was drawn and quartered in a social and psychological sense. But I learned from the experience. Note to self:
• Do NOT attack someone else when you are feeling personally threatened by their youth and/or maleness…even if you are rescuing someone else.
• Keep your comments to yourself, particularly if the thoughts are about the sexism in our culture and I am in the State of Montana.
• Work through your issues with men and do your best not to put all males in one group.
I recognize that poor Bill was confused. All he was doing was rescuing Camille. What I should have said to him in a calm, cool demeanor was, “You are rescuing Camille, rather than letting Camille rescue herself.”
I was trying to express that we are all products of a sexist culture. I also attempted to take control of the group. I thought “Pleasing” and “Comfort” were more important to me but this experience helped me to realize that “Superiority” and “Control” are my weaknesses and I need to check my own motivations before others feel inadequate or challenged because of my behavior.
In our group therapy class we split up into small groups of four people. We were discussing our handout about the priorities individuals have in groups. I initially wrote that “pleasing” was my number one priority. Boy was I mistaken. We talked about our individual goals and after a while we all get together in one big group and talked about what we had learned. The names are changed to protect the innocent.
Group purpose/process in terms of member roles, social interactions & behavior
Dr. Cinnamon was the facilitator and he asked Bill to share his small group experience. So Bill starts to tell how Camille was feeling compromised at work by men who seem to take advantage of her youth and beauty and say demeaning things to her. Bill began to talk about how he helped Camille to see her own worth by sharing the lyrics of a Tupoc rap song. At this point I was mentally rolling my eyes at the audacity of Bill (a white male who makes constant cracks that are demeaning to women and other minorities), to make things better for Camille. It was incredibly offensive and sexist to me. The fact that it was a rap song, (which is a style typically demeaning of women), in a graduate level academic setting was almost comical in my mind.
I can’t remember all I said, but in a nutshell, I told Bill he was a misogynistic male chauvinist. I told him he couldn’t possibly understand Camille’s perspective and to talk to her the way he did wasn’t the least bit empowering. (Which, of course, put the whole class on defensive). Several people made comments and the discussion turned to the cultural attitudes that are demeaning to women. I addressed the nickname assigned to Camille and voiced my concern at an individual being called after a snack food. Camille seemed miffed that I was discounting the men who were rescuing her. But what I felt was an attack of all men. In my mind I was all women and I was standing up for myself and my daughters and every blind woman in the room who doesn’t get how marginalized we are as a group.
Student’s internal experience (personal thoughts and feelings)
I can’t even remember everything everyone said. What I do remember, is the horrible feeling of other people thinking I was the problem. Someone else told me that everyone came away from it feeling worse rather than better. We stereotyped each other, and I’m the one who started it. How could I have done it differently? We all fell into a group mentality. Even I, the scapegoat, felt like it was okay that I was being used to help further everyone else’s education.
One of the most important things I’ve learned so far in this class is that group therapy’s goal is to model a functional family. We did the classic dysfunctional family thing. Alice was the only one who acknowledged that there was something seriously wrong with this exercise. She pointed out that I was being a scapegoat.
Later on that evening Alice wrote on facebook “Today’s group was the Mailgram experiment.” One class member did what alcoholic families do when they deny that there is a problem. She told Alice to just go to bed. I broke the rule of acknowledging that there is something wrong by pointing out the sexism of our culture.
I was drawn and quartered in a social and psychological sense. But I learned from the experience. Note to self:
• Do NOT attack someone else when you are feeling personally threatened by their youth and/or maleness…even if you are rescuing someone else.
• Keep your comments to yourself, particularly if the thoughts are about the sexism in our culture and I am in the State of Montana.
• Work through your issues with men and do your best not to put all males in one group.
I recognize that poor Bill was confused. All he was doing was rescuing Camille. What I should have said to him in a calm, cool demeanor was, “You are rescuing Camille, rather than letting Camille rescue herself.”
I was trying to express that we are all products of a sexist culture. I also attempted to take control of the group. I thought “Pleasing” and “Comfort” were more important to me but this experience helped me to realize that “Superiority” and “Control” are my weaknesses and I need to check my own motivations before others feel inadequate or challenged because of my behavior.
Monday, February 1, 2010
The Parable of the Ski Hill
Last Saturday I went skiing with Ren, Holly and assorted sons and nieces. It was Alyssa’s first time. She is an athletic 10 year old and she spent the morning on the wimpy, I mean bunny hill. After lunch, Drew and Madeline talked her into going up a more advanced lift. She told me as she was riding up “Majestic” she felt pretty uneasy when she saw how steep the mountain was. She was pretty confident on the bunny hill and didn’t really understand what getting on a lift meant. Ski lifts all look the same from the bottom and if you have only been up the bunny hill you may not understand just how much farther up the mountain and more difficult the runs are. Drew and Madeline assured her all would be swell and she trusted them instead of listening to that naggy little voice that told her this really isn’t a good idea.
Her Dad and I warned her a few hours earlier, (as she was headed toward another lift that was experts only). We tried to tell her the difference between black diamond and green square. She is one gutsy kid.
After a while, Holly got a little nervous and called Alyssa on her cell phone. Sure enough, poor little Alyssa was stranded on a steep hill. Her cousins had abandoned her and she had lost a ski and was seriously stuck. She couldn’t ski down the hill because it was too steep for her skill level.
A few minutes later I got a call from Madeline. She asked me what she should do. I told her that it was her choice but if I was her I would hike back up to where Alyssa was and stay with her until we could get there to rescue her.
So Ren and I took off. We skied to the front of the line and ditched the 99 and nine (Sam and Alexa). When we got to the top we went I search of Alyssa, called Madeline’s phone and followed the clues she gave me and ended up about 300 yards below them. I sidestepped up as far as I could and called to them, encouraging them to skoot down as far as they could on their bottoms. In the meanwhile, I realized how steep the mountain was and knew I wouldn’t be strong enough to get Alyssa down. So I called Doug. Luckily, he is an expert skier, and was on his way up the very lift.
Alyssa made it to where I was and I got her skies attached to her boots, her helmet on her head and her bod vertical. I tried to do the thing I’ve done dozens of times with my own children. The problem was, I did this when my kids were four or five. I put my skies on the outside of hers, held our poles out in front of us horizontally with her hands between mine and with the tips of my skies together, attempted to ski down the hill with Alyssa. We ended up turning into one of those cartoon versions of a snowball with legs, skiis, arms and poles flailing wildly as we tumbled down the hill.
I simply was not strong enough to support her weight and mine. Ren just looked on and shook his head. He is incredibly athletic and strong but lacks the skill. There we were, two adults, incapable of helping this kid because of unmet potential in skiing ability on Ren’s part and lack of physical strength on mine.
So we waited for Doug. He came flying over the crest of the hill in his red ski suit like a heroic santa clause. He deftly straddled Alyssa’s skies and held the poles in front of her and away they went. Ren and I did our best to keep up with them. Doug was in complete control and within minutes Alyssa was safely back on the bunny hill.
I thought of how many times in a young person’s life they are tempted to get involved in some tempting activity. Others may tell them it is no big deal and then leave them when they get stuck. They may feel too embarrassed to call for help but adults that love them will call and even leave other responsibilities to help them. But no matter what others do, there is often situations where only someone who is far above the rest of us in ability can help.
Our Savior is there to rescue us. He will get us down from the mountain of sin, even if we got up there by our own stupidity! It may take the help of others who are willing to hike back up and sit with us until help arrives. We may have to sit alone for awhile and contemplate the situation we got ourselves into. Parents and Aunts who love us may be the ones who call for help. Once we are ready for his help, even if it means we’ve tried other sources and tumbled, He will be there.
Her Dad and I warned her a few hours earlier, (as she was headed toward another lift that was experts only). We tried to tell her the difference between black diamond and green square. She is one gutsy kid.
After a while, Holly got a little nervous and called Alyssa on her cell phone. Sure enough, poor little Alyssa was stranded on a steep hill. Her cousins had abandoned her and she had lost a ski and was seriously stuck. She couldn’t ski down the hill because it was too steep for her skill level.
A few minutes later I got a call from Madeline. She asked me what she should do. I told her that it was her choice but if I was her I would hike back up to where Alyssa was and stay with her until we could get there to rescue her.
So Ren and I took off. We skied to the front of the line and ditched the 99 and nine (Sam and Alexa). When we got to the top we went I search of Alyssa, called Madeline’s phone and followed the clues she gave me and ended up about 300 yards below them. I sidestepped up as far as I could and called to them, encouraging them to skoot down as far as they could on their bottoms. In the meanwhile, I realized how steep the mountain was and knew I wouldn’t be strong enough to get Alyssa down. So I called Doug. Luckily, he is an expert skier, and was on his way up the very lift.
Alyssa made it to where I was and I got her skies attached to her boots, her helmet on her head and her bod vertical. I tried to do the thing I’ve done dozens of times with my own children. The problem was, I did this when my kids were four or five. I put my skies on the outside of hers, held our poles out in front of us horizontally with her hands between mine and with the tips of my skies together, attempted to ski down the hill with Alyssa. We ended up turning into one of those cartoon versions of a snowball with legs, skiis, arms and poles flailing wildly as we tumbled down the hill.
I simply was not strong enough to support her weight and mine. Ren just looked on and shook his head. He is incredibly athletic and strong but lacks the skill. There we were, two adults, incapable of helping this kid because of unmet potential in skiing ability on Ren’s part and lack of physical strength on mine.
So we waited for Doug. He came flying over the crest of the hill in his red ski suit like a heroic santa clause. He deftly straddled Alyssa’s skies and held the poles in front of her and away they went. Ren and I did our best to keep up with them. Doug was in complete control and within minutes Alyssa was safely back on the bunny hill.
I thought of how many times in a young person’s life they are tempted to get involved in some tempting activity. Others may tell them it is no big deal and then leave them when they get stuck. They may feel too embarrassed to call for help but adults that love them will call and even leave other responsibilities to help them. But no matter what others do, there is often situations where only someone who is far above the rest of us in ability can help.
Our Savior is there to rescue us. He will get us down from the mountain of sin, even if we got up there by our own stupidity! It may take the help of others who are willing to hike back up and sit with us until help arrives. We may have to sit alone for awhile and contemplate the situation we got ourselves into. Parents and Aunts who love us may be the ones who call for help. Once we are ready for his help, even if it means we’ve tried other sources and tumbled, He will be there.
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